kicking puppies is bad

I hate most radio personalities.  They are loud and obnoxious.  I miss  “Mordecai in your Motor Car” who managed to masterfully insert useless trivia between his impeccably chosen musical selections.  I’m sure his  distinctive deep, soothing voice never uttered a dick, fart or gay joke.  I’m even more positive that he never decided to ”charm the one eyed cobra” on his station’s live webcam during his show.    

But Mordecai Lipshutz retired.  Since marriage is about compromise, and I carpool to work with my husband, I often find myself listening to the obnoxious dick and fart jokes on Live 105′s “The Woody Show”.   Yesterday, the Woody Show’s discussion revolved around  a different radio show broadcast the previous evening.  Apparently, the host decided to “squeeze the cream from his flesh twinkie” while working.  This, by itself is somewhat troublesome.  But it was most disturbing because all the Live 105 shows are broadcast on the station’s live webcam (see footage)). 

Don’t get me wrong.  I have nothing against masturbation.  I’m even fairly ok with people who decide to “set sail with Captain Thumb on the USS Hand” while they’re at work.  But, when I say that, I am assuming they work in a private office with a door that locks that isn’t on 24 hour live webcam broadcast live to their office’s website.  I think even I could get fired for that one (and it is nearly impossible to fire a tenured government employee). 

I assume very few people were watching the Live 105 webcam at 11:30 at night (of course I assumed there were very few people who liked granny porn, but apparently I am wrong about that too).  Radio hosts aren’t known for being photogenic people.  If they were, they would be on TV.   And they’re not on TV.  So, who want to see tv-rejects sitting around  eating twinkies?   And in this case, I *actually* mean sitting around “eating twinkies” in the literal sense; no euphemism.  I’m sure many more people would watch if the hosts were actually “sitting around eating each others twinkies”.   So, I have to assume that he either forgot about the webcam or he assumed  no one was watching at 11:30 that night.  Its possible he found the idea that someone was watching arousing, but that just seems so stupid.   I mean, in this economy (or any economy) it seems like a quite a risk for a few minutes of joy.   Its fairly certain that you’ll get fired if your caught.  And then, what do you say in job interviews when they ask why you left your last job, “Well, I was having a really horny night, and it had been a long time since I’d gotten any play….”