kicking puppies is bad

Yesterday I was blog surfing on http://www.condron.us (or possibly http://alphainventions.com, I don’t remember which - either one is a wonderful way to waste a workday), and I stumbled on this blog about a coworker who was a ”Story Topper”.   I generally hate “story toppers”.  But yesterday, while I was eating my lunch when a co-worker approached me.  And I had this crazy surreal experience.  During our conversation, I had nothing to say that didn’t “top” her stories. 

She was talking about how pitiful her pets where when she rescued them, but I have spent several years working with animal rescue.  And when I adopted my dog, she had been beaten with a 2×4 and then left in a kennel until she was 30 lbs underweight with hookworms, ear infections, and kennel sores.  The vet said if she had been there three more days, she would have died.  The topic turned to “Dancing with the Stars” (which apparently everyone in my office except me watches regularly).  While we were talking about dancing and she mentioned that she used to do gymnastics.  I used to compete on my college ballroom dance team (and made it to collegiate nationals).   I have some *crazy* ballroom dance stories.  

In fact, every direction the conversation turned, I had a “story topper”.  I mean, I *did* just find out that I got a full scholarship to law school last week.  And I *was* certified as a foster parent.  And *I* do volunteer rescuing puppies, and I *did* place in collegiate nationals for ballroom dancing.   I graduated high school (with honors) in three years, and college in three years (with two majors and high honors).  And it isn’t like everything was handed to me. 

My life is like on of those horrible “Lifetime Television Network” movies about overcoming diversity (while finding true love and saving the world).  And If I randomly ended up watching my life story on Lifetime I would laugh at how crazy and unrealistic it was.   I really wish my life were LESS like a lifetime movie.  But it isn’t like I make this stuff up.   And having a horribly “adversity” filled existence while actually *doing* things (like foster parenting, volunteering, going to grad school, and competing in ballroom dancing) lends itself to having stories.  I actually *do* have more to talk about than what color my baby’s poo is.  Why do people always talk about their baby’s poo? 

In the end, I just shut up.  I didn’t mention competing at collegiate nationals for ballroom dancing, or the full scholarship I just recieved to law school.  I didn’t really mention anything about me.  I just smiled and nodded.  Because that is what most people want.  But I concluded that, in the future, I will be less annoyed by “story toppers”.  In fact, if I am around someone that *really* can constantly “top” ALL my stories, maybe I need to become a more interesting person.